Dad Brief: Hector Rivera
By: Brandon Troxell
Hector Rivera is a loving husband to his wife, Imelda, and a caring father to his daughter, Coco. He was also a passionate musician, and his love for music often took him away from home, straining the family he cherished. When Hector decides to quit touring to return home to his family, his life is tragically cut short, and his music, including “Remember Me,” the song written for Coco so she could always feel her father’s love, is stolen by his best friend and bandmate, Ernesto De La Cruz. Even more heart-wrenching, his family would blame him for his own death, disowning him and tearing his face from a family portrait to be removed from the Dia De Los Muertos ofrenda1, or family altar.
Since his murder, Hector would spend almost 100 years trying desperately to cross the marigold bridge back to the land of the living to see his dearest Coco. He tried disguises, even as ridiculous as dressing up as artist Frieda Kahlo and attempting to sprint across a bridge that buries him when he gets too far. He only becomes more desperate when he learns that Coco is dying, and soon, no one in the living world will remember him. Hector could vanish before he would ever see Coco again.
How far are we willing to go to show our love for our families? What would we give up? How desperate should we be to spend as much time with them as possible? “As Seneca wisely recommended,” quotes philosopher and author David Fideler, “let us greedily enjoy our friends and our loved ones now, while we still have them.”2 The job will be there when you get back. The phone call can wait. Why wait for the next sunny day when this one is happening now? What matters is now. Do not put off till tomorrow what can be done today, because nothing is guaranteed.
Cheers!
Brandon
In Mexican culture, during the Day of the Dead festival, dead ancestors can return home from the land of the dead to be with their families for one night only. That return is contingent on a photo placed on the family’s altar. Their existence in the land of the dead depended on those alive remembering them.
Fideler, David. 2021. Breakfast with Seneca: A Stoic Guide to the Art of Living. W.W. Norton & Company.
Nice work, Brandon! Life is way too short… embrace it! 🥰Thanks for sharing!
Wow this one really hit home for me! Thank you for another outstanding read. Life is short and our time is not guaranteed. I remember running around as a new mom and wife trying to make sure that the house was perfectly clean and the laundry was done and dishes weren’t piled up. Then, with exhaustion overcoming me… a little voice said to me mommy can that wait? I want to show you something. As tears filled my eyes I realized yes it can wait, but my kids can’t. There is no pause button on them growing rapidly and how many moments will I get for the “ can I show you sumpin?” Your kids don’t see the dishes or laundry, they see your eyes watching their little moves they want you present to see the silly faces, the scribble art work masterpiece, the cartwheel that looks like the drunk guy you remember watch falling. Time is precious, take time to stop and smell the roses! If you do maybe you won’t be fighting that bridge of marigolds.